Handling those WTF moments: time for a Controlled Epiphany?
Have you ever found yourself looking at your world through a different lens which suddenly triggers a crashing moment of realisation? Nothing has actually changed, yet with this new clarity you can’t help asking yourself, ‘what the **** am I doing?’
I think when we are busy ‘in’ and ‘doing’ the day to day, it can be hard to recognise our situation and acknowledge the effect it’s having on us.
Take the professional who suddenly wakes up to the fact that they’re several years into a job that demands a six hour round-trip commute, and they’ve got no life outside that. It may not have been so much of an issue at the outset – perhaps the job was meant to be a short term solution; yet somehow here they still are. And over that time this beast of a commute has taken its toll in small incremental stages, until one day it pretty much dominates how they live their life.
What’s happened here? Have they persuaded themselves that this permanent measure is still temporary? Have they persuaded themselves this is necessary, that it’s their only option? Are they too tired or scared to do something about it?
It’s important to find a way to see your ‘wood for the trees’ and get some wider perspective. Give yourself what my husband calls a ‘controlled epiphany’ every six months or so. Ask yourself what you want in 1, 3 and 5 years from now. And write it down! Then check in regularly to see if what you want has changed.
It’s good to remind ourselves of Henry Ford’s famous saying: ‘Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right.’ So try doing a little spying on yourself to notice what it is that you keep telling yourself you cannot do.